By Jennifer Byard
I think no matter what holiday you celebrate, it truly is (one of) the “most wonderful times of the year”. But there’s just one little tricky aspect of it that I dread. My husband and I call it “The Santa Situation”.
You see, we don’t “do” Santa. Don’t get me wrong, I love the jolly old man and all the goodness he and his entourage stand for just as much as the next person, and we make no judgements about anyone who does celebrate with Santa. I grew up a Santa believing kid myself and “Miracle on 34th Street” is still one of my must-watch holiday movies. In our house, we recognize Santa and company as fictional holiday characters just like Frosty the snowman and my kids love them for that.
But there’s another side to Santa that we don’t subscribe to. When I say we don’t “do” Santa, I usually get about the reaction of confusion and horror one would expect if I had said we were planning on wearing underwear on our head to dinner with the Queen.
To clear up the confusion, here’s why: There’s of course the fundamental reason that we want to focus on the religious celebration of Christmas (and we do celebrate the real St. Nicholas on December 6). We also want our children to appreciate the generosity of those who give them gifts and the resources used to make that possible. That’s hard to do when things magically come from “Santa”.
Secondly, the idea that kids are “scared” into being good by the threat of Santa not coming kind of takes away from the joy of the season, don’t you think?
Finally, and I think most applicably to this wonderfully diverse community we live in is the situation of everyone who doesn’t celebrate Christmas. If kids are told that Santa only visits kids who are good, how are parents supposed to explain to their kids why Santa didn’t visit their children’s little Jewish, Hindu, or Muslim friend?
So here’s the sticky part. I’m not the Grinch, and the last thing I want is for my kids to spoil the magic for any Santa believing children. No judging, remember? The problem is that every store cashier, acquaintance, and random person on the street asks my kids, often in the proximity of other potentially Santa-believing children, (before Christmas) “Are you excited for Santa to come?” and (after Christmas) “Did Santa visit you?”.
Eeek! I have a 4-year-old and a toddler. Any of you with children those ages know that no secret is safe with a preschooler. Every encounter from Thanksgiving to New Years is met with me holding my breath and crossing my toes that the response we’ve trained her to give of “I’m excited for Christmas” or “I had a nice Christmas” comes out and not something less desirable.
So far so good, and we’re using this as yet another teachable moment in life to learn about grace, tact, and respecting the feelings and beliefs of others.
But if you want to spare me a few breath holding encounters, why not try asking if we’re excited for the holidays instead? Because the answer is yes! We are!
A former civil engineer and C-U native, Jennifer is a holiday-loving stay-at-home mom looking forward to celebrating all aspects of the season with her husband Greg, daughter Éireann and son Brendan.
Join the discussion on Facebook: